1 00:00:04,304 --> 00:00:05,615 Okay, mr. Deluca. 2 00:00:05,639 --> 00:00:08,618 You, uh, want to just tell Me exactly what happened? 3 00:00:08,642 --> 00:00:10,019 Sure. 4 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:12,088 Unless I'm keeping You from something. 5 00:00:12,112 --> 00:00:14,591 Uh, it's okay. 6 00:00:14,615 --> 00:00:16,225 Thank you. 7 00:00:16,249 --> 00:00:18,061 Well, let's see. 8 00:00:18,085 --> 00:00:19,262 I was on my way 9 00:00:19,286 --> 00:00:21,798 To the jewish home and Hospital for the aged. 10 00:00:21,822 --> 00:00:23,767 I always go there on wednesdays. 11 00:00:23,791 --> 00:00:25,135 Oh? 12 00:00:25,159 --> 00:00:26,336 I'm a volunteer. 13 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,472 I read poetry to The old and the ill. 14 00:00:28,496 --> 00:00:29,606 That's nice. 15 00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:30,741 Yeah. 16 00:00:30,765 --> 00:00:32,342 Well, anyway, 17 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:35,178 I was just about Ready to catch my bus 18 00:00:35,202 --> 00:00:36,380 When I saw this woman 19 00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:38,982 Lying facedown on the sidewalk. 20 00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:40,517 Mm-hmm. 21 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:41,718 So I run over there 22 00:00:41,742 --> 00:00:44,621 Just as fast as my wooden Leg would carry me. 23 00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:45,922 I knelt down beside her, 24 00:00:45,946 --> 00:00:48,358 And I asked her if there Was something I could do. 25 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:51,460 And? 26 00:00:51,484 --> 00:00:53,262 And she says, "Sure." 27 00:00:53,286 --> 00:00:54,765 Then she grabs me in a headlock, 28 00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:56,332 Starts biting my ear. 29 00:00:56,356 --> 00:00:57,734 The next thing I know, 30 00:00:57,758 --> 00:01:02,171 Her and these two big guys Are going through my pockets. 31 00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:04,240 They kicked me in the Ribs a couple of times 32 00:01:04,264 --> 00:01:06,209 And ran away. 33 00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:08,878 They even broke My reading glasses. 34 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,648 God, I'm really sorry. 35 00:01:11,672 --> 00:01:13,450 Oh, no, no, that's okay. 36 00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:14,818 I mean, better me 37 00:01:14,842 --> 00:01:17,320 Than somebody less Fortunate, you know? 38 00:01:17,344 --> 00:01:20,356 Right. 39 00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:21,824 Look, why don't You just sit there 40 00:01:21,848 --> 00:01:22,892 And, um, you know, 41 00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,594 Try and make Yourself comfortable? 42 00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:26,429 I'll get you a cup of coffee. 43 00:01:26,453 --> 00:01:28,198 I don't want to put you out. 44 00:01:28,222 --> 00:01:29,866 That's okay. I don't mind. 45 00:01:29,890 --> 00:01:31,167 But I'm being a bother. 46 00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:32,835 It's okay. Look, I want a cup. 47 00:01:32,859 --> 00:01:33,836 I'll get it. 48 00:01:33,860 --> 00:01:36,439 Hey, I'll get it. 49 00:01:36,463 --> 00:01:38,463 - it's all the way... - I'll manage. 50 00:01:45,572 --> 00:01:48,651 Well, I... Yeah, it's A bit suspicious 51 00:01:48,675 --> 00:01:50,786 When a whole family Just disappears like that, 52 00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:52,444 But, uh... 53 00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:58,861 Um... Lady, look, 54 00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:02,065 There's nothing We can do about it. 55 00:02:02,089 --> 00:02:03,233 Yeah, sure. 56 00:02:03,257 --> 00:02:05,168 Yes, we'll keep an Eye out for them. 57 00:02:05,192 --> 00:02:06,469 Right. Bye. 58 00:02:06,493 --> 00:02:08,738 Someone missing? 59 00:02:08,762 --> 00:02:10,240 The waltons. 60 00:02:10,264 --> 00:02:12,808 Oh. 61 00:02:12,832 --> 00:02:16,246 Somebody wanted to know What happened to them. 62 00:02:16,270 --> 00:02:17,514 I think the, uh, 63 00:02:17,538 --> 00:02:20,283 I think the mother's A nurse now. 64 00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:22,474 I'll have to check it out. 65 00:02:29,883 --> 00:02:32,050 Marginal mail call. 66 00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:36,766 Just a bunch of junk. 67 00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:37,867 Appreciate it. 68 00:02:37,891 --> 00:02:40,170 That's what I'm here for. 69 00:02:40,194 --> 00:02:41,437 Here you go, sergeant. 70 00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:43,773 Thank you, carl. 71 00:02:43,797 --> 00:02:44,874 I read the book. 72 00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,842 - good morning, levitt. - morning, sir. 73 00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:48,611 Barney, alarm just went off. 74 00:02:48,635 --> 00:02:50,113 Office building on 5th. 75 00:02:50,137 --> 00:02:52,582 Oh, sir, I'm available. 76 00:02:52,606 --> 00:02:54,206 Take wojo. 77 00:02:58,645 --> 00:02:59,822 May I help you? 78 00:02:59,846 --> 00:03:03,526 Yes, I'm perlita avilar... 79 00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:05,228 From the philippines. 80 00:03:05,252 --> 00:03:07,330 Okay. 81 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:10,233 They told me downstairs that... 82 00:03:10,257 --> 00:03:12,490 Frank might be up here. 83 00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:15,070 Frank who? 84 00:03:15,094 --> 00:03:17,407 Frank luger. 85 00:03:17,431 --> 00:03:20,010 Uh, what do you Want to see him for? 86 00:03:20,034 --> 00:03:22,267 We're supposed to get married. 87 00:03:24,038 --> 00:03:26,471 My god. 88 00:04:36,843 --> 00:04:37,853 Didn't he, uh... 89 00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:39,422 Didn't he know she was coming? 90 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:41,857 I don't know. 91 00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:45,495 I mean, he went through That, uh, mail-order bride thing, 92 00:04:45,519 --> 00:04:46,762 What, six months ago. 93 00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:48,898 I thought he forgot About the whole thing. 94 00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,400 Did you? 95 00:04:50,424 --> 00:04:52,235 Well, I mean, we, uh... 96 00:04:52,259 --> 00:04:54,904 We went through the Magazines together. 97 00:04:54,928 --> 00:04:57,640 I picked her out, among others. 98 00:04:57,664 --> 00:04:59,709 I wrote all the letters. 99 00:04:59,733 --> 00:05:02,312 I can't imagine he would Make a decision like this 100 00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:03,579 Without checking with me. 101 00:05:03,603 --> 00:05:07,104 But, barney, he Didn't get her for you. 102 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:15,046 It's free now. 103 00:05:18,919 --> 00:05:22,665 I straightened it a little. 104 00:05:22,689 --> 00:05:27,169 Well, that really Wasn't necessary. 105 00:05:27,193 --> 00:05:29,204 Oh? 106 00:05:29,228 --> 00:05:32,142 I, uh, left a message With the inspector. 107 00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:33,710 Frank. 108 00:05:33,734 --> 00:05:37,112 He, uh, he should Be here momentarily. 109 00:05:37,136 --> 00:05:39,181 Thank you. 110 00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:41,884 He was expecting you, wasn't he? 111 00:05:41,908 --> 00:05:44,921 I think so. 112 00:05:44,945 --> 00:05:47,623 I'm telling you, I Didn't steal nothing. 113 00:05:47,647 --> 00:05:48,958 Double negative? 114 00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:52,228 Okay, I'm colloquial. So sue me. 115 00:05:52,252 --> 00:05:54,297 What, uh, what have we got here? 116 00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:55,865 This is vincent brysom. 117 00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:57,232 And you are? 118 00:05:57,256 --> 00:05:58,701 What happened? 119 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,970 Did luger show up yet? 120 00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:02,305 What happened? 121 00:06:02,329 --> 00:06:03,639 Uh, well, uh, 122 00:06:03,663 --> 00:06:06,209 We, uh, we got to That building there. 123 00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,311 We caught vinny here Sneaking out the back, 124 00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:10,947 Trying to cart off A video recorder, 125 00:06:10,971 --> 00:06:12,282 Two electric typewriters, 126 00:06:12,306 --> 00:06:14,049 And this bust of einstein. 127 00:06:14,073 --> 00:06:16,252 Yeah, he's a snob like All the rest of them. 128 00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:17,787 All the rest of whom? 129 00:06:17,811 --> 00:06:19,221 Mensans. 130 00:06:19,245 --> 00:06:20,923 Mensans? 131 00:06:20,947 --> 00:06:23,993 Yeah, we caught vinny Ransacking the mensa office. 132 00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:25,861 Mensa... Oh, that's, uh... 133 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,730 It's basically an organization 134 00:06:27,754 --> 00:06:30,065 That caters to people With an I.Q. In the top 2%. 135 00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:31,166 Right. 136 00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:33,135 Sort of a social Club for geniuses. 137 00:06:33,159 --> 00:06:35,004 What's the matter, 138 00:06:35,028 --> 00:06:36,672 You got something Against smart people? 139 00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:38,174 I'm a member. 140 00:06:38,198 --> 00:06:39,975 Yeah, I bet. 141 00:06:39,999 --> 00:06:41,411 No, he is, barn. 142 00:06:41,435 --> 00:06:42,812 Huh? 143 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:44,013 He had this on him. 144 00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:46,115 This says he's a member In good standing. 145 00:06:46,139 --> 00:06:47,917 Until now. 146 00:06:47,941 --> 00:06:49,118 You think this is funny? 147 00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:51,521 No. 148 00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:53,923 No, I was making a point. 149 00:06:53,947 --> 00:06:56,158 See, I joined mensa 150 00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:58,994 'cause I thought I could Find people like me there, 151 00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:01,030 People I could talk to. 152 00:07:01,054 --> 00:07:02,365 And? 153 00:07:02,389 --> 00:07:04,600 They told me to wise up. 154 00:07:04,624 --> 00:07:05,835 That's funny. 155 00:07:05,859 --> 00:07:07,737 Sure, make jokes. 156 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,105 Look, simple guys like You don't understand 157 00:07:10,129 --> 00:07:11,707 How frustrating it is 158 00:07:11,731 --> 00:07:14,043 To zip through the Sunday crossword 159 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,378 Like it was nothing. 160 00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:18,914 To always know how the Movie's gonna turn out. 161 00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:22,051 I can't have a simple Conversation with somebody. 162 00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:23,920 I just get bored. 163 00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:27,579 Wojo, take his statement. 164 00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:33,251 Okay, smart guy, sit down. 165 00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:36,932 So, what did you do, 166 00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:39,335 Teach yourself English on the plane? 167 00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:43,173 No, we were taught English in the school. 168 00:07:43,197 --> 00:07:46,976 And also, for 10 years, I Worked outside of manila 169 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,645 At clark air force base. 170 00:07:49,669 --> 00:07:52,749 Bombardier? 171 00:07:52,773 --> 00:07:55,151 No. I worked in the snack bar, 172 00:07:55,175 --> 00:07:57,108 As a cashier. Uh-huh. 173 00:07:58,211 --> 00:07:59,956 See, that's surprising. 174 00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,958 A nice girl like you. 175 00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:03,526 How come you didn't Marry a young flyboy? 176 00:08:03,550 --> 00:08:05,661 Oh. 177 00:08:05,685 --> 00:08:07,663 I had many proposals. 178 00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:11,223 But... Marriage was Never mentioned. 179 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,793 Oh. 180 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,964 How about that Ali-frazier fight, huh? 181 00:08:22,402 --> 00:08:25,181 The thing is, I was happy Back in grade school... 182 00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:26,849 You know, hanging Out with the guys, 183 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:29,485 Cutting assembly, Smoking in the boys' room. 184 00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:31,287 I had a ball. 185 00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:32,955 I know what you're Talking about. 186 00:08:32,979 --> 00:08:36,459 Then they go and they Give me this stupid test. 187 00:08:36,483 --> 00:08:38,661 Next thing I know, I'm A junior at columbia, 188 00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:40,295 Mathematics. 189 00:08:40,319 --> 00:08:41,764 I was 12. 190 00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:43,966 Tough break. 191 00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:46,002 You're damn right. 192 00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,937 No more friends. 193 00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:51,774 Strangers pointing At me in the cafeteria. 194 00:08:51,798 --> 00:08:55,211 Sorority girls Patting me on the head. 195 00:08:55,235 --> 00:08:57,513 The freak. 196 00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:59,971 Inside. Yeah, right. 197 00:09:01,841 --> 00:09:05,020 So anyway, I'm off for My doctorate, right? 198 00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:09,259 I'm maybe halfway through a Thesis in theoretical telemetry. 199 00:09:09,283 --> 00:09:11,561 I said, to hell with this. 200 00:09:11,585 --> 00:09:14,697 I packed my bags, Got on my bicycle, 201 00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,732 Knocked off a liquor store, 202 00:09:16,756 --> 00:09:19,023 And I never looked back. 203 00:09:21,461 --> 00:09:23,439 You know it took me Three years to pass 204 00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:25,441 The stupid sergeant's exam? 205 00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:28,044 Really? 206 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:30,145 Wow. 207 00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:31,803 That's great. 208 00:09:37,277 --> 00:09:39,088 Hold it, mabel. 209 00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,624 Don't set the table. 210 00:09:41,648 --> 00:09:43,192 Frankie luger's at the plate. 211 00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:44,627 Pyow! 212 00:09:44,651 --> 00:09:47,363 And we're going Into extra innings. 213 00:09:47,387 --> 00:09:48,731 Well, inspector... 214 00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:51,188 You, uh, ready To hit a home run? 215 00:09:54,994 --> 00:09:58,073 How's it going, har? 216 00:09:58,097 --> 00:10:00,276 Diet, barn, wo. 217 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:01,744 Wojo: inspector. 218 00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:03,880 Aloha, wahine. 219 00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:06,916 Frank? 220 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,674 It's very nice to Meet you, frank. 221 00:10:17,150 --> 00:10:19,629 Likewise, I'm sure. 222 00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:21,586 Your office, barn? 223 00:10:27,193 --> 00:10:29,561 I shall return. 224 00:10:39,906 --> 00:10:43,786 - well, barney? - what do you mean, "Well"? 225 00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:46,388 Well, I got your message. You wanted to see me. 226 00:10:46,412 --> 00:10:48,524 Yes, about miss Avilar out there. 227 00:10:48,548 --> 00:10:50,026 Who? 228 00:10:50,050 --> 00:10:52,762 Oh, sweet leilani. 229 00:10:52,786 --> 00:10:56,599 Oh, what did she have To say for herself? 230 00:10:56,623 --> 00:10:59,869 She in town for the boat show? 231 00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:02,038 You did send for her. 232 00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:06,843 Not in the... In the Classic sense, barney. 233 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:09,012 I sent her one lousy postcard... 234 00:11:09,036 --> 00:11:10,747 Picture of the Chrysler building. 235 00:11:10,771 --> 00:11:13,850 Scribbled a little note on it. 236 00:11:13,874 --> 00:11:16,118 "Thanks for your letters. The weather here's fine. 237 00:11:16,142 --> 00:11:18,721 "If you ever get in this neck Of the woods, look me up. 238 00:11:18,745 --> 00:11:22,058 Maybe we'll get Married. Regards, frank." 239 00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,726 That's all there was to it. 240 00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:27,063 That's all? 241 00:11:27,087 --> 00:11:28,898 Well, I did apply 242 00:11:28,922 --> 00:11:34,070 For one of them sweetheart Visa permits, you know, 243 00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:35,771 Whatever they call them, barney. 244 00:11:35,795 --> 00:11:37,073 And then in a weak moment 245 00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:40,243 I may have signed some Gobbledygook immigration papers 246 00:11:40,267 --> 00:11:44,480 That they stuck under my Nose as I'm walking out the door. 247 00:11:44,504 --> 00:11:46,448 But I figured all That junk, barney, 248 00:11:46,472 --> 00:11:48,517 It'd probably get Lost on a junk. 249 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,021 You did send for her. 250 00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:54,657 I was only being polite, barn. 251 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,592 You got a hell of A way of showing it. 252 00:11:56,616 --> 00:12:00,029 That woman just Traveled 10,000 miles 253 00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:01,964 On the basis of your proposal. 254 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:04,200 She's been sitting out There in that squad room, 255 00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:07,703 Stuck all morning, Waiting to see you. 256 00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,138 All right. 257 00:12:09,162 --> 00:12:10,840 You're starting To get cold feet? 258 00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:13,876 Fine. We can deal with that. 259 00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:18,136 But you cannot avoid The issue by hiding in here. 260 00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:22,819 You're absolutely right, barn. 261 00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,386 I'll be downstairs. 262 00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:26,422 Inspector... 263 00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:31,094 I don't want to get mixed up In these domestic squabbles. 264 00:12:31,118 --> 00:12:33,029 You'll get rid of her, barney. 265 00:12:33,053 --> 00:12:34,385 Thanks. 266 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:39,423 Uh, hey, got to run. 267 00:12:40,894 --> 00:12:41,870 Captain? 268 00:12:41,894 --> 00:12:44,040 Uh, miss avilar. 269 00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:46,208 Is something wrong? 270 00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:47,609 No. No, no, no. 271 00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:50,212 Uh, the inspector just Remembered something 272 00:12:50,236 --> 00:12:52,214 He had to do downstairs. 273 00:12:52,238 --> 00:12:54,216 Police matter. 274 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:57,719 Oh, I see. 275 00:12:57,743 --> 00:12:59,188 Is he coming back? 276 00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:00,589 Of course. 277 00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:02,992 Of course. Why shouldn't he? 278 00:13:03,016 --> 00:13:05,461 Well, perhaps I should leave. 279 00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:06,395 No. No, no, no. 280 00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:07,663 Please. 281 00:13:07,687 --> 00:13:09,898 I promise you he'll Be back momentarily. 282 00:13:09,922 --> 00:13:12,902 He will? Maybe I'll leave. 283 00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:14,470 Why don't you do what you can 284 00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,105 To make miss avilar Feel comfortable? 285 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:19,708 Some coffee, tea, a magazine? 286 00:13:19,732 --> 00:13:21,743 I feel like I'm Still on the plane. 287 00:13:21,767 --> 00:13:24,546 Smoking, non-smoking? 288 00:13:24,570 --> 00:13:26,148 I'll get you some tea. 289 00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:27,849 Thank you. 290 00:13:27,873 --> 00:13:30,108 Excuse me. 291 00:13:34,381 --> 00:13:37,160 I'm norman. I have 17 foster-children. 292 00:13:37,184 --> 00:13:39,117 Hey! 293 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,205 Yeah, can I help you? 294 00:13:49,229 --> 00:13:51,773 I'm william dietz... Mensa. 295 00:13:51,797 --> 00:13:56,100 Stanley wojciehowicz... Moron. 296 00:13:58,104 --> 00:13:59,748 At any rate, they Informed me downstairs 297 00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:01,617 That you're holding Our mr. Brysom here. 298 00:14:01,641 --> 00:14:03,852 Yeah, that's him over There in the cage. 299 00:14:03,876 --> 00:14:05,621 Oh, my. 300 00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:08,424 The poor fellow looks Like he's on exhibit. 301 00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,882 Well, it's free. 302 00:14:17,823 --> 00:14:19,168 Hello, vincent. 303 00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:20,803 Baldy. 304 00:14:20,827 --> 00:14:22,004 Yes. 305 00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:25,474 Anyway, I was Relaxing at my desk, 306 00:14:25,498 --> 00:14:27,243 Thumbing through "The rosetta stone" 307 00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:29,511 When I heard the disturbing news 308 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,513 That you had pillaged Our little club 309 00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:34,417 And made off with some Rather valuable property. 310 00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:36,986 Yeah. So? 311 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,955 Mr. Dietz, I'm captain miller. 312 00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:40,022 Captain, captain, 313 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,890 I must say that I Am quite displeased 314 00:14:41,914 --> 00:14:45,294 With your treatment Of mr. Brysom here. 315 00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:49,131 Uh, I assume you're aware That mr. Brysom was arrested 316 00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:51,600 For burglarizing the Offices of your organization. 317 00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:52,869 Yes, yes, yes. 318 00:14:52,893 --> 00:14:56,772 If I could just have a Word with mr. Brysom... 319 00:14:56,796 --> 00:14:58,140 In private. 320 00:14:58,164 --> 00:15:00,097 Certainly. 321 00:15:01,668 --> 00:15:02,912 Thank you. 322 00:15:02,936 --> 00:15:04,647 Anyway, vincent, 323 00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:06,815 The thing I don't Quite understand, 324 00:15:06,839 --> 00:15:08,316 So to speak, 325 00:15:08,340 --> 00:15:11,053 Is why you chose To steal from us. 326 00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:12,888 Why not? 327 00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,891 Yes, but... We're your own kind. 328 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:19,027 I must say that I feel A little bit betrayed. 329 00:15:19,051 --> 00:15:21,764 Don't take it personal. I steal from everybody. 330 00:15:21,788 --> 00:15:24,900 Vincent, we are Hardly everybody. 331 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:25,934 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 332 00:15:25,958 --> 00:15:27,703 Listen. I mean... No, listen. 333 00:15:27,727 --> 00:15:29,271 The sole purpose of mensa 334 00:15:29,295 --> 00:15:31,907 Is to bring people Like us together 335 00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,076 As intellectual equals... 336 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,779 A select group of minds 337 00:15:36,803 --> 00:15:40,482 Melded into a Magnificent cerebral mass 338 00:15:40,506 --> 00:15:42,117 Which can hurtle its way 339 00:15:42,141 --> 00:15:44,019 Across the horizon of knowledge 340 00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:49,525 Up to the very Edge of esoterica. 341 00:15:49,549 --> 00:15:52,116 I just wanted to Talk about broads. 342 00:15:55,789 --> 00:15:58,601 Excuse me. Would You like a tootsie roll? 343 00:15:58,625 --> 00:16:00,202 No. Thank you. 344 00:16:00,226 --> 00:16:03,305 I always keep a handful In my pocket, you know? 345 00:16:03,329 --> 00:16:04,974 For the kids who Come into my shop? 346 00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:06,241 Yeah? 347 00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:08,444 I fix toys. 348 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:10,313 Oh, that's nice. 349 00:16:10,337 --> 00:16:11,780 Thank you. 350 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,771 You're welcome. 351 00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,323 So, anyway, uh, 352 00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:23,359 I've been noticing you Sitting here all day alone, 353 00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:25,928 And I figure maybe you're Feeling a little bit sad. 354 00:16:25,952 --> 00:16:27,964 I mean, what with Coming all the way over 355 00:16:27,988 --> 00:16:31,633 And not knowing exactly What's going on and all. 356 00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:33,135 Well, I just want to say 357 00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:36,672 That if things don't work Out exactly like you planned, 358 00:16:36,696 --> 00:16:38,907 And if it isn't too much Of an inconvenience, 359 00:16:38,931 --> 00:16:41,877 Then I'll marry you. 360 00:16:41,901 --> 00:16:45,281 I'm flattered that You offered, norman, 361 00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:49,807 But I'm afraid I've already Made a commitment to frank. 362 00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:54,123 Sure. I understand. 363 00:16:54,147 --> 00:16:55,813 No problem. 364 00:17:03,789 --> 00:17:07,102 Boy! 365 00:17:07,126 --> 00:17:08,103 Anyway, vincent, 366 00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:10,272 I must say that, Having evaluated 367 00:17:10,296 --> 00:17:13,809 The pedestrian lifestyle You've embraced... 368 00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:16,245 You know, skulking Down dark alleyways, 369 00:17:16,269 --> 00:17:19,114 Climbing out of windows With your little sack, 370 00:17:19,138 --> 00:17:21,383 Allowing yourself To victimize people 371 00:17:21,407 --> 00:17:23,685 Who hardly merit Your attention... 372 00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:24,953 Well, I must say, 373 00:17:24,977 --> 00:17:26,388 I find the whole nasty business 374 00:17:26,412 --> 00:17:28,190 Quite disheartening. 375 00:17:28,214 --> 00:17:29,191 Who cares? 376 00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:30,226 I care. 377 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,994 I do, vincent. I Want to help you. 378 00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:35,030 I want to help you to Cultivate your potential, 379 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:37,799 To groom you for achievement, 380 00:17:37,823 --> 00:17:41,170 To mold you into someone People admire and respect. 381 00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:42,171 Mm-hmm. 382 00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:44,206 Like me. 383 00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:45,674 After all, you know, 384 00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:48,910 I did found a booming Investment firm. 385 00:17:48,934 --> 00:17:51,914 I'm highly regarded On the lecture circuit... 386 00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:53,815 Anthropology. 387 00:17:53,839 --> 00:17:55,417 I have a town house in the city. 388 00:17:55,441 --> 00:17:58,387 I have an estate In vermont, geneva. 389 00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:02,157 I have a beautiful, Intelligent wife, ruth. 390 00:18:02,181 --> 00:18:03,893 Ruth. 391 00:18:03,917 --> 00:18:06,295 You've heard of her, then? 392 00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:08,096 Hmm? 393 00:18:08,120 --> 00:18:09,364 You must have seen her... 394 00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:12,067 The blonde in the maserati. 395 00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:16,404 One who likes her Men young and dumb... 396 00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:19,041 Construction Workers, bartenders, 397 00:18:19,065 --> 00:18:20,943 Hockey players, cops. 398 00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:22,244 Uh, sarge. 399 00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,813 Okay, so maybe I don't Have bulging biceps 400 00:18:24,837 --> 00:18:26,248 Or a swarthy complexion. 401 00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:29,018 Maybe I do lack a Certain animal magnetism 402 00:18:29,042 --> 00:18:32,587 Or handful upon Handful of dark, wavy hair. 403 00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:33,889 Mr. Dietz. 404 00:18:33,913 --> 00:18:38,227 Well, grass doesn't grow On a busy street, buster. 405 00:18:38,251 --> 00:18:40,562 Sorry. 406 00:18:40,586 --> 00:18:41,964 Do you want to step over here? 407 00:18:41,988 --> 00:18:43,198 We'll sign a complaint. 408 00:18:43,222 --> 00:18:45,267 Actually... 409 00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:47,837 Actually, I think that We are better equipped 410 00:18:47,861 --> 00:18:50,372 To deal with mr. Brysom Than the penal system 411 00:18:50,396 --> 00:18:53,175 As it is currently constituted. 412 00:18:53,199 --> 00:18:55,310 You're saying you're Not gonna press charges? 413 00:18:55,334 --> 00:18:56,311 No. 414 00:18:56,335 --> 00:18:59,014 Providing that mr. Brysom 415 00:18:59,038 --> 00:19:01,650 Agrees to return With me to mensa 416 00:19:01,674 --> 00:19:05,387 And attend a few of my Personality workshops. 417 00:19:05,411 --> 00:19:07,122 I'll pass. 418 00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:09,580 I get that from ruth. 419 00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:13,896 Vincent. 420 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:16,999 Vincent, are you gonna allow me 421 00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:18,701 To walk right out of here 422 00:19:18,725 --> 00:19:22,137 And to leave you in The custody of these... 423 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:24,239 Well, you know what they are. 424 00:19:24,263 --> 00:19:27,609 Yeah, I do. 425 00:19:27,633 --> 00:19:29,378 I'd rather be here. 426 00:19:29,402 --> 00:19:31,279 Thank you. 427 00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:32,414 Fine. 428 00:19:32,438 --> 00:19:33,816 Mr. Dietz, 429 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,406 Would you mind having a Seat at my desk for a minute? 430 00:19:39,879 --> 00:19:42,312 You got a chance to walk Out of here a free man. 431 00:19:46,352 --> 00:19:48,653 You're doing a stupid thing. 432 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:52,256 Well, it's a start. 433 00:20:02,801 --> 00:20:04,735 I'm back. 434 00:20:09,175 --> 00:20:11,108 Thanks, toots. 435 00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:18,193 I see you're still here, huh? 436 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,161 There was nowhere else to go. 437 00:20:20,185 --> 00:20:21,597 Oh, yeah. Right. 438 00:20:21,621 --> 00:20:23,832 Inspector. 439 00:20:23,856 --> 00:20:25,923 Barney. 440 00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:29,805 Did you want to see me? 441 00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:31,307 No. 442 00:20:31,331 --> 00:20:33,308 Her. 443 00:20:33,332 --> 00:20:35,265 Oh. 444 00:20:37,003 --> 00:20:38,781 Gentlemen, it's About check-out time. 445 00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:39,882 Yeah, I'm out of here. 446 00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,316 We were just leaving. 447 00:20:41,340 --> 00:20:42,751 Yep. 448 00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:43,919 Come on, vinny. 449 00:20:43,943 --> 00:20:45,876 One sec. One sec. 450 00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,614 Come on. 451 00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,852 Couldn't help it. 452 00:20:57,924 --> 00:21:01,236 Um, I got to... Run. 453 00:21:01,260 --> 00:21:03,505 Luger: go on. 454 00:21:03,529 --> 00:21:05,462 Good luck. 455 00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:10,913 You certainly have a Way with people, frank. 456 00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:13,081 Oh, thank you. 457 00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,716 You know, 458 00:21:14,740 --> 00:21:17,653 I was beginning to think You weren't coming back. 459 00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:19,722 I almost left. 460 00:21:19,746 --> 00:21:23,025 I guess I saved you a trip, huh? 461 00:21:23,049 --> 00:21:25,194 Well, no, actually, I got to thinking, 462 00:21:25,218 --> 00:21:26,929 And I figured that... 463 00:21:26,953 --> 00:21:29,364 Uh, that I owe you an apology 464 00:21:29,388 --> 00:21:33,268 For my rude behavior Before and all. 465 00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:36,171 That isn't really necessary. 466 00:21:36,195 --> 00:21:37,206 Oh, no? 467 00:21:37,230 --> 00:21:40,976 I mean, if you find Me unattractive, 468 00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:44,179 If I'm just not what you're Looking for in a wife, 469 00:21:44,203 --> 00:21:46,114 Then just tell me. 470 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:47,115 Oh, no. 471 00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:48,684 I'll understand. 472 00:21:48,708 --> 00:21:51,019 You look fine. 473 00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:52,654 Really? 474 00:21:52,678 --> 00:21:53,755 Yeah. 475 00:21:53,779 --> 00:21:55,757 Yeah, a little young, maybe. 476 00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:57,358 You're not too tall. 477 00:21:57,382 --> 00:22:01,619 But... You're healthier Than I had planned. 478 00:22:02,688 --> 00:22:05,167 I sent you my photograph. 479 00:22:05,191 --> 00:22:06,568 Oh, yes, but I kind of... 480 00:22:06,592 --> 00:22:08,670 I figured that was A picture of, maybe, 481 00:22:08,694 --> 00:22:11,240 Your great-granddaughter Or mrs. Marcus 482 00:22:11,264 --> 00:22:14,230 Or one of the local Banana queens or somebody. 483 00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:19,047 That's a really nice Thing to say, frank. 484 00:22:19,071 --> 00:22:21,383 Yes. Yes, it is. 485 00:22:21,407 --> 00:22:24,819 Oh, look, but don't Go getting any ideas 486 00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:28,623 About people throwing The rice and old shoes yet. 487 00:22:28,647 --> 00:22:30,959 I wouldn't do That if I were you. 488 00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:32,227 Oh? 489 00:22:32,251 --> 00:22:33,461 No. 490 00:22:33,485 --> 00:22:36,097 The last 30, 40 years, 491 00:22:36,121 --> 00:22:38,934 I've been pretty much on my own. 492 00:22:38,958 --> 00:22:41,103 I go and come when I please, you know, 493 00:22:41,127 --> 00:22:45,073 In and out of my little One-room apartment, 494 00:22:45,097 --> 00:22:47,843 Quiet dinners at The horn and hardart, 495 00:22:47,867 --> 00:22:50,345 Take in a movie now and then... 496 00:22:50,369 --> 00:22:53,548 And an occasional Burlesque show, 497 00:22:53,572 --> 00:22:55,183 If you'll pardon the expression. 498 00:22:55,207 --> 00:22:56,718 Oh, it's pretty hard 499 00:22:56,742 --> 00:23:00,122 To give up all that good stuff. 500 00:23:00,146 --> 00:23:04,815 Then... Why did you send for me? 501 00:23:07,019 --> 00:23:10,754 Well, because I'm lonely. 502 00:23:13,292 --> 00:23:15,604 Me too. 503 00:23:15,628 --> 00:23:17,138 You too? 504 00:23:18,964 --> 00:23:21,698 Okay. Now what? 505 00:23:26,038 --> 00:23:27,983 I'm a little hungry. 506 00:23:28,007 --> 00:23:30,552 Hungry? 507 00:23:30,576 --> 00:23:33,555 Well, that's no Problem, I, uh... 508 00:23:33,579 --> 00:23:36,591 There's a vending machine Downstairs in the locker room. 509 00:23:36,615 --> 00:23:38,893 Oh, no, I'm just kidding. 510 00:23:38,917 --> 00:23:40,295 Huh? What do you say? 511 00:23:40,319 --> 00:23:42,531 We'll go out, find A nice little spot, 512 00:23:42,555 --> 00:23:44,133 Put on a feed bag, okay? 513 00:23:44,157 --> 00:23:46,535 Okay. 514 00:23:46,559 --> 00:23:49,159 Okay. I'll get your bag. 515 00:23:51,831 --> 00:23:54,176 Oh, uh, there's Just one other thing 516 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:57,813 I think I ought to mention Before we go any further. 517 00:23:57,837 --> 00:24:00,615 We'll go out and Have a nice dinner. 518 00:24:00,639 --> 00:24:04,886 But after that, I can't Promise any dancing. 519 00:24:04,910 --> 00:24:06,254 Know what I mean? 520 00:24:06,278 --> 00:24:07,790 Okay. 521 00:24:07,814 --> 00:24:08,790 Okay. 522 00:24:08,814 --> 00:24:12,127 After you, miss... Perlita. 523 00:24:12,151 --> 00:24:14,229 Perlita. 524 00:24:14,253 --> 00:24:16,153 Perlita luger. 525 00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:23,193 Everything work out?